Last week I titled my blog, Don’t be a Hero, the word God had been speaking to me for several weeks. It was timely and helped me navigate the part of the breast cancer journey I was on, to be realistic about the major surgery I’d just had and make decisions that would help me get through the summer,

However, last week as the start of chemotherapy drew near, God’s message to me began to change. On both June three and five, my Scripture readings contained Philippians 4:13, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. As I thought and prayed, I understood God was saying that just because He had told me not to be a hero didn’t mean I wouldn’t have to do anything that was hard.

How very important it is that we are current with what God is saying as time passes. Otherwise, we may misconstrue His Word for a previous time to mean something He never intended.

I’ve always believed Philippians 4:13 means I can do everything God wants me to do, everything God is telling me to do, because He was will give me strength to do those things. I can’t just make up my mind to do something I want to do and use Philippians 4:13 to say God will be give me His strength to do it.

So as the five steroid tablets kicked in on Monday night prior to my first day of chemo, waking me after a few hours of sleep, I was able to lie peacefully beside Donn until morning. I can honestly say I wasn’t stressed or worried, and in fact wasn’t thinking at all about what might happen the following day, because God was enabling me to do that.

I prayed for our neighbors, one by one, and I prayed for people at our church and situations that I knew needed prayer. I prayed for wisdom to know when I would be able to set up more book events after I learned how I was affected by chemo. I had known it would be foolish to set them up until I knew whether or not the chemo made me sick.

My oncologist told me some people don’t get sick at all with chemo but most people who do, get sick on the third day following the treatment. Only time would tell which category I fall into. I would also need wisdom to know when I would be healed enough from my surgery that doing book events wouldn’t qualify for being a hero. But I didn’t worry, just rested in the Lord.

As I think back on that night, I believe the peace I experienced was truly miraculous because often the dark hours of the night are when Satan wreaks the most havoc with our minds. I give much credit to the many people who’ve told me they are praying for me every day. How grateful I am for all your prayers!

Others had reminded me that having chemo is a ripe field for harvest and ministry, which I believe it can be, but while that first day did contain some ministry, mostly it was just a huge blessing. I talked for hours with a young woman who has cancer and her mother who accompanied her. They had also had a devastating loss prior to discovering she had cancer just as we had, so I was able to express genuine empathy.

As time went on, I recognized that the daughter, at least, was a believer as she shared how, before she was diagnosed, she packed her van with kids to take them to church. She also “adopted” them as substitute nieces for the niece she had lost.

The sweet-faced volunteer and I soon discovered we had much in common too. She had taught English in China with a Christian organization, although with many more restrictions than we’d had because of the Country they were in. We had a wonderful time sharing experiences.

Shortly before we left, an older man came in for a shot of some kind. I can’t remember exactly what question the nurse asked him, but he replied, “Jesus is my friend!” Donn and I chimed in on that one, and I added, “We’ve been married 53 years, and we always tell people, ‘Jesus is the glue that holds us together!’”

To which the gentleman gave a hearty, “Amen!”

I’m trying to follow all the instructions I was given in written form before I left the Cancer Center and am doing well. Only God knows what the future holds—as I‘m writing this on Wednesday, I don’t know yet if I’ll be sick tomorrow. But regardless, I have God’s promise that if I am, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

Thank you, Father, that we serve a God who speaks. Help us to rightly divide the Word of Truth so we don’t misunderstand what you’re saying to us. Amen.

Thursday, 10:30 a.m.

Health Update

I woke up with a bad headache this morning, but with a few Tylenol, it passed. I’m not ready to run any races, but I’m not sick either, praise God.